I was attending a District Christmas party a few years back with Tom and his mom. We were sitting at a table with a few folks we knew and some we didn’t. I introduced myself to the people I didn’t know and asked their names and asked the pastors where they were serving. After a little small talk, the pastor sitting next to me whom I didn’t know asked me,
“What are 5 outreach ministries of your church?”
It shocked me and made me laugh!
I thought I was at a Christmas party, but suddenly it felt like I was in a job interview or before
the Board of Ordained Ministry!
He was dead serious though, with no “Ho, ho, ho” involved.
It was and still is funny to me, but I did answer his question.
I’ve always considered myself good at asking questions.
That skill developed early in my life as a result of growing up in seven different states.
(My father’s job moved us around a lot. He was a civil engineer who built things. When the project was completed, we moved.) Moving so much, changing states, changing schools, meant that I was always the new kid on the block. In order to get to know people quickly and find friendships and places where I might fit in, I asked questions in order to learn about the people in my new world and the spoken and unspoken systems in place in that new environment.
Of course I didn’t think about it that way.
What I thought was, “I’m new, I’m lonely, I need a friend!”
Asking questions helped.
Questions opened doors and unlocked information I needed to adapt to my new environment.
Since we are all living in and adapting to a new pandemic environment, I’m presently reading the book Leading With Questions: How Leaders Find the Right Solutions By Knowing What to Ask by Michael J. Marquardt.
I’m finding this book is complimented by another book I’ve read, Susan Beaumont’s work in
How to Lead When You Don’t Know Where You’re Going.
Beaumont speaks of our blind spots resulting from the personal filter we use to make judgements about data, circumstances, and people, including ourselves.
She talks of regaining a sense of wonder – moving out of our certitude and getting comfortable with unknowing. To become “suspicious of our own thinking” and ask questions.
As leaders, we often feel obligated to have a fair amount of the answers locked down.
Living in the space of not knowing and consequently not immediately fixing, can be unsettling.
Yet, isn’t that what we are called to do as followers of Christ?
We answer God’s call to leave our own version of the well-known fisherman’s shore to follow Jesus to destinations unknown, destinations wholly new and different.
We follow the God Whose ways are nothing like our ways [Isaiah 55:8-9].
Shouldn’t that lead to a little suspicion regarding our own motivations
as well as a few questions?
Shouldn’t answering the call of Christ in our lives involve the daily movement of
trusting in the Lord with all our heart and not leaning so heavily and so certainly on our own understanding?
What if that’s the deep water where we need to put our nets down for a catch?
Perhaps we should wonder…
What questions do we need to ask that we aren’t asking?
What questions are we afraid to ask because we really don’t want to know the answer?
What wonder of our soul does God long to hear?
In our asking, we are opening the doors of our lives to receive God’s more.
In our asking, we approach the past, present, and future with more wonder than fear.
In our asking, we give God room to breathe God’s new into our hearts, minds, and souls.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8
I wonder what that would look like for you and for me?
Grace and peace,
Dena
If you would like to view past editions of Grace for the Journey, follow this link: https://fairwaydistrictnc.org/category/from-the-ds/